You Won't Believe What This KLM Flight Attendant Said

I hate those headlines, but I was feeling uninspired.

There's a human factors exercise known as the "Five Hazardous Attitudes," where pilots evaluate their tendency towards different safety ways of neglecting the safest route. It occurred to me today that airline passengers suffer from exactly the same tendencies. They are anti-authority: disregarding crew instructions just because they don't want to be told what to do. They are impulsive: too busy to pay attention or to do it right. They don't want to think about it so pretend they are invulnerable or can handle it on their own. And very often they are resigned and don't take any responsibility for their own safety.

A friend was irritated by a flight attendant asking her to pay attention to a passenger briefing and commented, "Surely these people don't actually believe that anyone is getting out alive if that thing goes down in Irish Sea?!" Last time I was at my annual medical I was complimented on my low blood pressure and as the doctor explained how the machine worked he commented that at other times, my blood pressure might be higher. I think this is one of those times. Aviatrix rant activated.

People get out. Smart, lucky people who have paid attention in the safety briefing and remembered how many rows to the nearest and alternate exit in each direction. I am a professional pilot and I pay attention to the safety briefing when I am a passenger.

An A340 jet went off the end of the runway into a ravine, in Toronto during a thunderstorm. Half the exits were unusable, and 90 seconds later the aircraft burst into flames and burned to a shell. EVERYONE GOT OUT. With few, minor, injuries.

An A320 ditched in the river in New York. One dipshit passenger who hadn't paid attention to the emergency briefing opened a door that was not to be used in the case of a water landing. That passenger jeopardized the lives of others, and most of the passengers forgot to take their seat cushions with them to use as a flotation device, but EVERYONE GOT OUT. Mainly minor injuries, the worst may have been to a flight attendant who was trapped in the rear because of the stupid passenger.

A B767 that had been hijacked ditched in the Indian Ocean, out of fuel, and while the captain was struggling with hijackers. FIFTY PEOPLE SURVIVED. Many of those who did not survive died because they didn't pay enough attention to the emergency briefing to remember not to inflate their life jackets before leaving the aircraft.

You put down what you are doing, you take off your headset and you pay attention to that announcement as if your life and the lives of those around you depend on it. Because they do. Decades of research have gone into manufacturing the aircraft and safety equipment and training the crew to give you the safest flight possible. The least you can do is pay attention for ninety seconds.

In non-rant mode, I have to admit that Doreen Welsh wasn't really trapped, and that her difficulty evacuating was because of an injury sustained in the crash, but a passenger opening the wrong door and flooding the aft of the aircraft didn't help her or anyone else get out. The point of this blog post, however, is what another friend posted in response, talking about her preflight behaviour. I'm just going to leave it here, because I have no coherent response.

I noted to the flight attendant that I didn't have a flotation device beneath my seat. She said, very quietly, but very aggressively (since she had been quick to already tell me it was nothing to do with her, since it was the flight engineers that do those checks), that we wouldn't be delaying take off to sort this out, since there was no chance we would get out alive anyway. I also never heard back from the letter I wrote to KLM.

Qausuittuq

At the end of the year I usually check on the progress of my New Year's resolutions, and then make new ones. I did make eight resolutions for 2014, but they were all personal, not aviation, and I'm not telling you exactly what they were, so this will be dull, or at least cryptic:

1. Achieved: A+
2. Social - 71% achieved (51% before the middle of April and 10% after the beginning of November): B-
3. Academic - never set measurable goals, even though that was part of the resolution, achieved maybe 20% anyway: F
4. Fun - 58% (25% before the end of March and 25% during December): C-
5. Ha ha ha ... I don't think that one lasted to the end of New Year's Day: Withdrawn
6. Physical - Achieved by the beginning of March. Now EXACTLY back where I started. I still think that's still a pass, because I did achieve it: C
7. Speed - Negative progress: F
8. Martial arts - Did really well until April 6th, then lost momentum, and had to work through both the events I was supposed to be training for - 40%: F

The general theme is that I kept them well until work got busy and then life became entirely sleep, eat, plan, fly, laundry. I think I just have to not make resolutions that involve doing anything not on that list on a recurring basis through the year. For next year I am going to set month-by-month goals that allow for no progress to be made during peak months, and encourage me to pick things up again as my time increases at the end of the season, without feeling defeated.

Qausuittuq means "place where the sun does not rise" but it's on this post because the place that bears that traditional name is usually called Resolute.

Fighting for Others

I have a pilot friend visiting from another province, looking for work herself. It's no conflict of interest, because we have different experience and different goals, so it's been a source of inspiration to see her share my frustrating experiences and the same psychological difficulty to do the simplest things like walk into someone's place of business and hand over a resume. Preparing for her visit renewed my efforts, and possibly paid off in the opportunities that are opening up for me now. I hope it's not too frustrating for her to see me getting a chance when she is at a tough stage of the hunt.

As I strategize and arrange networking opportunities for her with people who I think can give her advice or help get her resume in the right hands, it occurs to me that I am somehow willing to work harder to help her find employment than I am for myself. I've been more creative in my thinking and more willing to call people to ask for help when it's not for me. I don't even think of myself as a particularly nice or generous person, maybe a six or a seven on a scale of one to ten running from most selfish to most generous. I hate it when people mess with my stuff, but there's something in me that leaps to defend against injustice, and leaves me almost unable to not help, if something is within my power. How to harness this energy for my own success? Heck, if I could just harness it to get my own laundry done I'd be ahead.

Some Backstory

Do you play video games? Sometimes while I am playing video games I realize a moment too late what move I should make and then make that move anyway. So I shoot the wall, instead of the enemy, wasting ammunition. I jump after the door has closed, and slam into the wall. I turn around right after the Pac-Man ghost stops being blue. It's not slow reflexes, it's more of a "no! I meant to do this!" It's the action of a pilot who moves the gear lever to the "extend" position after landing gear up.

I'm wondering to what extent I do that in my career. There are jobs I would have killed for years ago that I shouldn't take now, but the instinct is that I still want them. What should I aim for? Do I have enough power dots left on this level to try and lure the ghosts to me, or should I just sneak around and get all the little dots to get through without dying?

A few weeks ago I realized I was sending out job applications without much of a plan, or a really clear idea of what it was reasonable for me to expect to achieve. I needed some help sorting out my career. I needed someone who knew me, who knew the various aspects of aviation in which I have participated, and who had realistic knowledge of the Canadian aviation scene. I know a number of wonderful people The name of the right person came to me one morning and when I e-mailed him, I discovered that he had moved back to my part of the country since I'd seen him last, so his home was only a couple of hours drive away. And he was happy to counsel me, declining my offer to pay for his time.

I brought my logbooks, my resumé, and a big box of kleenex, but I'm proud to say that I didn't burst into tears the whole time. He listened, he nodded, he told me my aspirations were not unreasonable for my age and experience and then as a bonus he rattled off a list of potential employers along with inside information on their hiring. It was encouraging and enjoyable, and I kind of wish I had built on that in a more stable fashion, but the next day I received the job offer that launched the most recent round of Aviatrix rides the roller coaster.

I'll go back to reading manuals at you in a few days, no doubt. Or I'll get a job and move across the country and you won't hear a thing for weeks.

Sarah linked to the above picture yesterday in a comment and it made me laugh so hard I had to share it. What is that eagle doing? Is the image upside-down?

Responsibility

The thing about looking for a job is that you have to convince people of your value, right when your self esteem may be at its lowest. I agonize over self-assessment and skills evaluation. I never measure up to what I want for myself, and awareness of the fact that people are incompetent to assess themselves doesn't help at all. The worse I am the lower my ability to actually determine if I'm any good. It holds all the potential for a spiral of despair.

I have a friend who is looking for a job at the same time. We ended up in one of those romantic comedy type moments where it turned out we each thought the other had it all together and wished that we could be that way. She has more IFR command experience than I do. We both have atypical employment histories, in different ways. We're both female, which of itself is another characteristic separating us from the stereotypical candidate. Most employers these days should be able to picture a pilot who isn't a twenty-something white male aviation college grad in their uniform. It's just something else for us to stress about. We're trying to be job search buddies.

I applied to a really low-paying job, just because it was in an area, an aircraft and a type of operation where I'd like to work. I confessed my sin to my buddy and she admitted that she almost applied too. It made me feel better, and I told her authoritatively not to apply. Why do pilots do this to ourselves. We are worth more. I hope.

All the Ones

It's 2011-01-01 or 1/1/11 as the Americans write it. New Year, new resolutions. No loopholes. Short and sweet. Ruthlessly and objectively assessable.

In 2011 I will:

• run or cross-country ski five hundred kilometres. Score out of 500, one point per kilometre.
• do strength and flexibility exercises at least three times a week. Score out of 200, one point per workout, minus one for each week without a single one.
• create, back up and maintain a contact information list of people in my life, and I will exchange communications with everyone on it at least once. Out of how ever many end up on the list.
• make a list of twelve things I don't do merely because I am afraid to, and I will do one every month. Out of 100: four points for making the list, one point for each attempt, and up to seven points each for how well I do them.
• make and keep a weekly flight sim date with myself, and I will learn to like it. Out of 100: one point for simming and up to one point per day for doing it well.
• convince City Hall to paint a crosswalk on my street, for people to get to the bus stop. I score a hundred points when the paint is dry.