Today ATC asked me to keep the speed up, then gave me a series of heading instructions so bizarre that I was tempted to ask the controller if he was attempting to write his name on the radar. I was literally zigzagged back and forth across the normal inbound route, with occasional backtracking. Once, immediately after I had been told to fly direct towards a landmark following a road, another aircraft reported over my destination landmark, and was told to follow my same road in the opposite direction. It was only five miles away, almost the same altitude, so that made me a little antsy until ATC turned us both in new directions.
We were number three on base when number two was asked to go around, so I got to cut the corner a little and land. I'm really starting to believe my joke about the controller trying to create a pattern on the radar.